1.An English teacher asked her class to write an essay on what they'd do if they had a million dollars. Alec handed in a blank sheet of paper. 'Alec !' yelled the teacher, 'you've done nothing. Why?' 'Because if I had a million dollars, that's exactly what I would do !'
2.Little Johnny was crying one day, and his dad asked him why. 'I've lost five cents,' sobbed Johnny. 'Don't worry,' said his dad kindly.' Here's five more for you,' At this Johnny howled louder than ever. 'Now what is it ?' asked his dad. 'I wish I'd said I'd lost ten cents!'
3.Can I borrow that book of yours How To Become A Millionaire? Sure. Here you are. Thanks - but half the pages are missing. What's the matter? Isn't half a million enough for you?
4.Why is money called dough? Because we all knead it.
5.Why are men like bank accounts?
Without a lot of money, they don't generate much interest!
6.Why did the millionaire count his money with his toes?
So it wouldn't slip through his fingers!
7.A woman proudly told her friend, “I’m responsible for making my husband a millionaire.” “Well what was he before he married you?” the friend asked. “A billionaire.”
8.If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
9.Don't lend people money... it gives them amnesia.
10.Creditors have better memories than debtors.
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